Tag shitpost

https://twitter.com/RisuToInu/status/1451418521129340968

KinkedIn

the apocalypse, but make it fashion. ✨ (@ElleArmageddon)Fri, 22 Oct 2021 05:27 +0000

https://twitter.com/RisuToInu/status/1451418521129340968

Like imagine recruiters cold calling “ we saw you got ten endorsements for x, you seem like a great fit for this role bc you can tolerate pain”

Stella (@RisuToInu)Fri, 22 Oct 2021 06:40 +0000

Everyone is asleep so let’s agree it is a shame you can’t be endorsed for sexual skill on LinkedIn 💫

Stella (@RisuToInu)Fri, 22 Oct 2021 05:09 +0000

https://twitter.com/1uigi/status/1450565341826912256

"Are scrum masters indoctrinating our kids?! Tune in every night this week at 6 pm for a stand up to learn more!"

it's pronounced aksfjh 👖 (@aksfjh)Wed, 20 Oct 2021 20:42 +0000

Linux has so many built-in password managers: syslog .bash_history .zsh_history .mysql_history …

🇫🇷 Jean-Ph˙ ͜ʟ˙ppe 🇪🇺 (@Jipe_)Mon, 18 Oct 2021 19:28 +0000

women will study Immanuel Kant but they Kant get imman to treat them uel

john patrick (@john_from_hr)Tue, 29 Dec 2020 21:55 GMT

Just doing some online shopping... Picking up some loo roll... 14p per what?!

Jo (@ThisIsJoFrank)Mon, 18 Oct 2021 20:39 +0000

🌍 Global brands care about you very much.

🥃 Larry & Paul 🥃 (@larryandpaul)Thu, 14 Oct 2021 08:56 +0000

open source devs be like "I'm gonna make this class private" so much for open source huh

GAMER  (@__eater__)Thu, 14 Oct 2021 17:28 +0000

WholesomeMemes (@WholesomeMeme)Fri, 15 Oct 2021 13:04 +0000

Hiring in the tech industry

Shubheksha ✨ (@ScribblingOn)Wed, 13 Oct 2021 14:01 +0000

My brother asked me if he should join Oracle I said ‘yes’ 35 years lying in wait, but when you see it, you spring. He’s gonna rethink tattling on me to mom that is for sure.

Jason Warner (@jasoncwarner)Mon, 11 Oct 2021 23:31 +0000

everything be reminding me of her gatdamn

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It's #NationalCinnamonRollDay and here are my vegan cinnamon rolls :)

Dominique 🌱 (@veganhippiesol)Mon, 04 Oct 2021 19:23 +0000

Jacky Alciné (@jackyalcine)Mon, 04 Oct 2021 19:53 +0000

A while back I met a self-proclaimed bro who spends all his time literally destroying the world looking for coins. The funny thing about it all, he never bought anything with the coins, but kept collecting them as if his life depended on it.

Kelsey Hightower (@kelseyhightower)Sun, 03 Oct 2021 06:58 +0000

Who called it a Kubernetes penetration test and not a clusterfuck

Ian Coldwater 📦💥 (@IanColdwater)Tue, 22 Jun 2021 21:09 +0000

https://twitter.com/jna_sh/status/1443537983953588227

when my tummy hurts a bit too much for too long

maisie spell 🔔 🏳️‍⚧️ (@hiMaisie)Sat, 02 Oct 2021 08:39 +0000

I must be at the wrong conference. This is bbb

Paul Seal (codeshare.co.uk) (@CodeSharePaul)Sat, 02 Oct 2021 07:40 +0000

Using this

🧗‍♂️ Matt Holt (@mholt6)Fri, 01 Oct 2021 05:54 +0000

Pretty happy with the new name for the Roomba

Jessie Frazelle (@jessfraz)Wed, 29 Sep 2021 03:07 +0000

exactly why I end up in this type of situation all the time

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Does anyone else feel real rude when a plumber or electrician is over because you can't help them and they just have to do it themselves

them fatale (@clondalkhun)Mon, 27 Sep 2021 10:28 +0000

cal? (@cal_gif)Wed, 29 Sep 2021 05:34 +0000

https://twitter.com/freezydorito/status/1439322895323381761

do you ever just start a meme and in the middle of production absolutely forget what point you were going for here because

laura bananas (@freezydorito)Sat, 18 Sep 2021 20:28 +0000

As a child I took part in a delayed gratification study, and just now, at 28, received my 10^38 marshmallows

AL SMITH (@Al_D_Smith)Fri, 17 Sep 2021 15:50 +0000

The Prestige (d. Christopher Nolan, 2006)

Screaming Pectoriloquy (@Caulimovirus)Sat, 11 Sep 2021 04:52 +0000

Is anybody else vaguely reminded of Downton’s MR Carlson? Just me then? Aight.

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Proboscis monkeys love looking like they are shocked by the allegations

Vinny Thomas (@vinn_ayy)Sun, 12 Sep 2021 23:49 +0000

pumpkin spice genehack (@genehack)Mon, 13 Sep 2021 05:29 +0000

shitposting on LinkedIn is such an underrated activity lmaoooo

will (@will_ye_)Tue, 07 Sep 2021 11:22 +0000

This.

Andrew Nette (@Pulpcurry)Sat, 04 Sep 2021 00:31 +0000

the fact that there's a .top gTLD but not .bottom, seems like discrimination, to me

HAIL THE ORB (@joe_no_privacy)Sat, 04 Sep 2021 15:52 +0000

If the inevitable Docker Desktop OSS implementation isn’t called Free Willy, everyone should he ashamed of themselves.

Christina Warren (@film_girl)Tue, 31 Aug 2021 21:32 +0000

Why is it called product owner and not feature creep

Mathias Schäfer (@molily)Thu, 19 Aug 2021 13:45 +0000

something doesn't feels right.

Kushal (@batfleckwaynes)Mon, 16 Aug 2021 18:25 +0000

How QR codes are made:

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David Rousset (@davrous)Wed, 11 Aug 2021 12:27 +0000

Nick Craver (@Nick_Craver)Wed, 11 Aug 2021 23:54 +0000

Stop taking social media so serious. Nothing here is real. Look at this chicken 🐓🚗 it is bigger than the car

Leo Xander (@STALLE0N)Tue, 03 Aug 2021 16:00 +0000

Okay this is getting out of hand

Dr. Jacqueline Nolis (@skyetetra)Sat, 31 Jul 2021 17:20 +0000

images that might be cursed (@mightbecursed)Fri, 30 Jul 2021 06:24 +0000

Why programmers like cooking: You peel the carrot, you chop the carrot, you put the carrot in the stew. You don’t suddenly find out that your peeler is several versions behind and they dropped support for carrots in 4.3

Randall Koutnik (@rkoutnik)Wed, 16 Jan 2019 20:22 GMT

No I’m not “emotionally eating” Ben and Jerry’s, I’m supporting Palestine

Ely Kreimendahl (@ElyKreimendahl)Tue, 20 Jul 2021 15:41 +0000

https://twitter.com/mcclure111/status/1417569414891941889

The new GPU has three slots labeled "DP" and if you ask me that is too much at once

mcc (@mcclure111)Tue, 20 Jul 2021 19:45 +0000

Lenchu ★「JoJosús」 (@LenchuChu)Mon, 19 Jul 2021 11:28 +0000

https://twitter.com/walkingjalopy/status/1416957916330881025

i love my job as a guard with clearance to access the high-security wing. i also love going to the closest bar by the facility for after-work drinks, and having a bafflingly alluring woman beckon me into the bathroom for what’s surely going to be a good time

Pattern Ignorer (@erasmusNYT)Mon, 19 Jul 2021 03:23 +0000

https://twitter.com/erasmusNYT/status/1416961855025725441

Can't wait to get off from my shift at the Plastic Magneto Prison oh wait Rebecca Romjin is chatting me up

Boyd Robertson (@brstreetfighter)Mon, 19 Jul 2021 03:36 +0000

I hate when dates are just talk about boring work stuff like passwords and guard rotations at the research facility you work at

one note parody account devolved into railing abou (@walkingjalopy)Mon, 19 Jul 2021 03:07 +0000

Tabs vs Spaces

Pavol Rusnak ⚡🟩 (@pavolrusnak)Sat, 17 Jul 2021 22:18 +0000

My mom used to think putting nail polish on my nail would keep me from suckin my thumb. Now I eat ass. Everyone lost that battle.

ashy daddy (@Thundercat)Fri, 16 Jul 2021 17:30 +0000

BUT WHEN I GOT THERE THEY SAID THE PRINCESS WAS IN ANOTHER CASTLE, CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT? ANYWAY THAT'S WHEN I GOT REALLY INTO GO KARTS

berbatov cocktail (@ComradeYouSpurs)Sun, 11 Jul 2021 20:25 +0000

Never meet your heroes

Tom Moylan (@moylato)Sat, 10 Jul 2021 20:41 +0000

I am convinced that a small and dedicated group of twitter devs could tweet hot takes about a completely made up AWS product, idk AWS Infinidash or something, and it would appear as a requirement on job specs within a week

Joe Nash (@jna_sh)Wed, 30 Jun 2021 10:10 +0000

I'd just like to interject for a moment. What you're referring to as Copilot, is in fact, GNU/Copilot, or as I've recently taken to calling it, GNU code trained Copilot. Copilot is not an AI system unto itself, but rather a proprietary component that launders GNU code

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https://twitter.com/pfctdayelise/status/1410063455273377793

"Once, GitHub Copilot suggested starting an empty file with something it had even seen more than a whopping 700,000 different times during training -- that was the GNU General Public License." docs.github.com/en/github/copi…

eevee (@eevee)Wed, 30 Jun 2021 02:49 +0000

Ian Coldwater 📦💥 (@IanColdwater)Thu, 01 Jul 2021 12:25 +0000